Many people have opinions about sex toys, but few know the variety available beyond the rabbit vibrators, butt plugs, and dildos often seen in pornographic media. Venturing beyond mainstream sex toys opens up new opportunities for pleasure, transcending traditional heteronormative sex scripts.
Sex toys can create space for pleasure and intimacy that complements or goes beyond penetrative or oral sex. They allow couples to explore each partner's evolving arousal points continually.
How Sex Toys Enhance Intimacy
Couples of any gender and sexual orientation may incorporate sex toys into their sex life for various reasons. Sex toys expand the scope of sex, offering different sensations and pathways to arousal and orgasm. Used alone, they help individuals become more in tune with their bodies, making it easier to communicate sexual preferences to partners. Toys can also help partners understand each other's bodies, arousal responses, and how to stimulate erogenous zones.
Sex toys can help close the orgasm gap in heterosexual couples, where approximately 65% of women orgasm compared to 95% of men. Toys like clitoral vibrators, suction cups, and point stimulators can be great starting points, as only about 36% of vaginal users orgasm.
Remote-controlled vibrators can stimulate the prostate, anal glands, and vaginal and clitoral areas, even from a distance. These toys can be operated via Bluetooth, allowing couples to maintain intimacy even when apart.
Exploring Erogenous Zones with Sex Toys
Erogenous zones are areas that are arousing when properly stimulated. Common zones include the clitoris, lips, penis, testicles, neck, and nipples. Other areas include the inner thighs, earlobes, wrists, and toes. Everyone's erogenous zones are unique, so it's worth exploring these areas in a safe space of curiosity and consent.
Toys like nipple clamps, anal beads, and vibrators can stimulate various areas. Massage and vibrating toys can be used on external areas like the mons pubis, neck, and more. Feathers, whips, and lubricated massage oils can also enhance erogenous zone sensuality.
Talking to Your Partner About Incorporating Sex Toys
Despite society's more open attitudes toward sex, stigma still surrounds bringing sex toys into a couple's sex life. Negative associations might include feelings of sexual inadequacy or boredom with the current sex life. However, sex toys can spice things up and allow partners to explore new sensations and intimacy.
When introducing toys to your partner, be prepared to debunk myths and emphasize the benefits for both parties. Start small and ensure all partners are comfortable. Remember that communication, consent, trust, and debriefing are integral to any sexual exploration to ensure everyone feels safe and comfortable.